Comedy of Ramayan

Puri RAMAYAN biwiyo ki hai.

Laxman apni wali ghar pe chodkar chala aaya.

Rawan dusare ki utha ke fas gaya.

Hanuman ki apni thi hi nahi magar dusre ki dhundhne me lanka jala dali.

Ram ko apni wapas lane ke liye 10 din tak ladai karni padi.

Wapas lake bhi kya mila?

Ek dhobi ne apni 'night out' wali biwi ko wapas ghar me nahi li,

toh Ram ne apniwali ko out kar dala.

Aur end me kya hua?

Jis biwi ke kaaran itni badi ramayan hui wo to underground chali gayi.!

Ab socho, ye saara jhamela hua kyo?

Kyu ki Dashrath ki 3 biwi thi.

Jisme tisriwali ekdum HATELI thi...!

Aurat ka chakkar babu , aurat ka chakkar .

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Ab ye to pakka hai ki Purush sirf takat dikha sakta hai lekin dimaag se khokhla hota hai... Unhe apni life main kya chahiye woh pata he nahin... isliye humesha galat kaam karte hain aur baki logon ko uska parinaam bhugatna padta hai.

Whenever I read something funny about Ramayan where the women always suffer, I remeber Lajja movie and I feel so good about Madhuri Dixit's dialogues. Watch it if you haven't yet.

Angry Wife to her Husband over Phone...

An angry Wife to her Husband over Phone: "Where the hell are you ...?"

Husband: "Darling you remember that Jewellery shop where you saw the Diamond Necklace and totally fell in Love with it and I didn't have money that time and I said "Baby it'll be yours 1 day ..." O:)"

Wife, with a Smile & Blushing: "Yeah I remember that My Love!"

Husband: "I'm in the Pub just next to that shop."

LOL

I'm Dying...!!

Husband texts to wife on cell... "Hi, what r u doing Darling?"
Wife: "I'm dying..!"
Husband jumps with joy but types "Sweet Heart, how can I live without U?"
Wife: "U idiot! I'm dying my hair..."
Husband: "Bloody English Language!"

LOL

World's Shortest Fairy Tale

Once upon a time, a guy asked a girl "Will you marry me?"

The girl said "No."

And both of them lived happily ever after...

The guy went fishing and hunting and drank beer whenever he wanted... ...

The girl went shopping and ate at wherever she wanted and enjoyed life... ...

The End

Woman Work - by Maya Angelou

Read one more poem from Maya Angelou and I have fallen in love with it... I have shared it here.

Read few other poems and I must say, I am in love with each and every word she uses in her poems and the powerful feelings emerge throw the sentences like waves of the ocean in a full moon.

I am sure you would love it too... (No offense if you don't like)

Woman Work

President Barack Obama presenting Angelou with the
Presidential Medal of Freedom,
2011

I've got the children to tend
The clothes to mend
The floor to mop
The food to shop
Then the chicken to fry
The baby to dry
I got company to feed
The garden to weed
I've got shirts to press
The tots to dress
The can to be cut
I gotta clean up this hut
Then see about the sick
And the cotton to pick.

Shine on me, sunshine
Rain on me, rain
Fall softly, dewdrops
And cool my brow again.

Storm, blow me from here
With your fiercest wind
Let me float across the sky
'Til I can rest again.

Fall gently, snowflakes
Cover me with white
Cold icy kisses and
Let me rest tonight.

Sun, rain, curving sky
Mountain, oceans, leaf and stone
Star shine, moon glow
You're all that I can call my own.

What a woman should...? - in Maya Angelou's words

MAYA ANGELOU

I received this poem in an e-mail from my sister today... Loved it... here I Shared it...

(Don't know the Title of the poem at the moment)

A WOMAN SHOULD HAVE ...
enough money within her control to move out
and rent a place of her own,
even if she never wants to or needs to...
something perfect to wear if the employer,
or date of her dreams wants to see her in an hour...

A WOMAN SHOULD HAVE ...
a youth she's content to leave behind....
a past juicy enough that she's looking forward to
re-telling it in her old age....
a set of screwdrivers, a cordless drill...
one friend who always makes her laugh.... and one who lets her cry..

A WOMAN SHOULD HAVE ...
a good piece of furniture not previously owned by anyone else in her family...
eight matching plates, wine glasses with stems,and a recipe for a meal,
that will make her guests feel honored...

A WOMAN SHOULD HAVE …
a feeling of control over her destiny...
how to fall in love without losing herself...

EVERY WOMAN SHOULD KNOW...
how to quit a job,
break up with a lover,
and confront a friend without;
ruining the friendship....

EVERY WOMAN SHOULD KNOW....
when to try harder…and WHEN TO WALK AWAY...

EVERY WOMAN SHOULD KNOW...
that she can't change the length of her calves.
the width of her hips, or the nature of her parents..
that her childhood may not have been perfect...but it's over...

EVERY WOMAN SHOULD KNOW...
what she would and wouldn't do for love or more....
how to live alone... even if she doesn't like it...

EVERY WOMAN SHOULD KNOW..
whom she can trust, whom she can't,
and why she shouldn't take it personally....

EVERY WOMAN SHOULD KNOW...
where to go...
be it to her best friend's kitchen table.
or a charming Inn in the woods....
when her soul needs soothing...

EVERY WOMAN SHOULD KNOW...
What she can and can't accomplish in a day...
a month...and a year...

...women are helpless until their nail polish dries

Boy: Boys are stronger then girls.

Girl: Oh! Please, can you carry a 7 pound baby in your stomach for 9 months? Can you cook, clean and talk on the phone at the same time? Can you burn your forehead with a curling iron and not complain? Can you walk all day in 5 inch heels? Can you cry all night then wake up the next morning like everything is okay?? Remember guys, woman are only helpless until their nail polish dries :)

How to detect Hidden Camera and 2-Way Mirror?

HOW TO DETECT HIDDEN CAMERA IN A TRIAL ROOM?

In front of the trial room take your mobile and make sure that mobile can make calls.

Then enter into the trail room, take your mobile and make a call.

If u can't make a call...; then there is a hidden camera.

This is due to the interference of fiber optic cable during the signal transfer.

Pinhole Cameras in Changing Rooms of Big Bazaar, Shoppers Stop?

Yes it's very much possible.

HOW TO DETECT A 2-WAY MIRROR?

When we visit toilets, bathrooms, hotel rooms, changing rooms, etc., how many of you know for sure that the seemingly ordinary mirror hanging on the wall is a real mirror, or actually a 2-way mirror.

The 2 wishes... #Hilarious

A man walks into a restaurant with a full-grown ostrich behind him, and as he sits down, the waitress comes over and asks for their order.

The man says, "I'll have a hamburger, fries and a coke," and turns to the ostrich. "What's yours?" "I'll have the same," says the ostrich.

A short time later the waitress returns with the order. "That will be $6.40 please," and the man reaches into his pocket and pulls out exact change for payment.

The next day, the man and the ostrich come again and the man says, "I'll have a hamburger, fries and a coke," and the ostrich says, "I'll have the same." Once again the man reaches into his pocket and pays with exact change.

Chetan Bhagat’s Article in TOI for Indian Women

Fri, Jul 22, 2011 at 10:16 PM
Subject: Specially for Indian Women.. Chetan Bhagat's Article... ... Do Read it girls...

Chetan Bhagat’s Article in today’s Times Of India: Specially for Indian Women…  Do Read it girls…

“Alright, this is not cool at all. A recent survey by Nielsen has revealed that Indian women are the most stressed out in the world: 87% of our women feel stressed out most of the time. This statistic alone has caused me to stress out. Even in workaholic America, only 53% women feel stressed.

What are we doing to our women? I'm biased, but Indian women are the most beautiful in the world. As mothers, sisters, daughters, colleagues, wives and girlfriends - we love them. Can you imagine life without the ladies?

For now, i want to give Indian women five suggestions to reduce their stress levels.

One, don't ever think you are without power. Give it back to that mother-in-law. Be who you are, not someone she wished you would be. She doesn't like you? That's her problem.

Transition - Beautiful to Cute

My husband was just coming out of anesthesia after a series of tests in the hospital, and I was sitting at his bedside. His eyes fluttered open, and he murmured, "You're beautiful."

Flattered, I continued my vigil while he drifted back to sleep. Later he woke up and said, "You're cute."

"What happened to 'beautiful'?" I asked him.

"The drugs are wearing off," he replied.

Medicine to deal with Drunk people #KeepYourMouthShut

A woman goes to the doctor, beaten black and blue ... ...

Doctor: "What happened?"

Woman: "Doctor, I don’t know what to do. Every time my husband comes home drunk he beats me to a pulp..."

Burnt Biscuits

When I was a kid, my Mom liked to make breakfast food for dinner every now and then. And I remember one night in particular when she had made breakfast food after a long, hard day at work. On that evening, my Mom

placed a plate of eggs, sausage and extremely burned biscuits in front of my dad. I remember waiting to see if anyone noticed! Yet all my dad did was reach for his biscuit, smile at my Mom and ask me how my day was at

school. I don't remember what I told him that night, but I do remember watching him smear butter and jelly on that  biscuit and eat every bite !

When a GIRL...

Your woman...

The woman in your life...very well expressed...

Tomorrow you may get a working woman, but you should marry her with these facts as well.

Here is a girl, who is as much educated as you are;

Who is earning almost as much as you do;

One, who has dreams and aspirations just as you have because she is as human as you are;

One, who has never entered the kitchen in her life just like you or your Sister haven't, as she was busy in studies and competing in a system that gives no special concession to girls for their culinary achievements;

One, who has lived and loved her parents and brothers and sisters, almost as much as you do for 20-25 years of her life;

What do Women really want?

This was story shared by one of my friend with me. Read ahead to understand women…

(To women) Please take time to ponder... ...

(To men) Just enjoy the story... ... *

Young King Arthur was ambushed and imprisoned by the monarch of a neighboring kingdom.

The monarch could have killed him but was moved by Arthur's youth and ideals. So, the monarch offered him his freedom, as long as he could answer a very difficult question. Arthur would have a year to figure out the answer and, if after a year, he still had no answer, he would be put to death.